Saturday, March 28, 2009
miss lee is back
let the past be the past. n look to the future.. cc,i love u,hold on,ull get through this. we all did
Saturday, March 14, 2009
a death
"i'll see you again. alright?" she just casually say that to me before leaving my house.
"yes,i will see you,take care ok? i love you and i will miss you." i casually replied her.
as i look at her leaving,i feel a pain in my heart. i cant describe it. she looks ill.she is in her wheel chair and my mom push the chair to my dads car n help her to get in it. and she left.since then,it was never the same.
i have been praying for her,hoping she could survive just today,and maybe tomorrow will be a better day. a place in my heart,always telling me everything is alright. god it taking care of everything. and that is how i got my peace.
occasionally,my uncle will call up and tell her how is she doing. some days she will be top of her game but some days,shes down and sick. feels like she has lost her will to live.all she have was us. we are always there to support her,to love her,and to make sure shes alright.
i remembered those days when i come home from school and i can just check how was she doing and ask her does she want some fruit jus. she was staying at my house back then. i am always happy to make her some fruit jus. avacado,kiwi, green apple,banana. all this fruits were usually her choose of fruit jus.the sound of the blender bleding those fruits always annoys me and i hope that the noise didnt make her feel uncomfortable in any way.
before this,she used to make me shepards pie. and i love it. i eat them all day and night. her shepards pie are the best. massing up the potatos,cutting the carrot into cubes,slicing the onions, and chooping the frozen beef. those were the memories i have with her making shepards pie.
she was always cheerfull and happy,even when she was sick. she always think of others first. she put people first and then her needs,second. she loves her family alot. shes always the one whom remember everyones birthday. shes always there for us. she loved us.in my heart,i always knew i will see her once every year when she comes back from aussie.
saturday,7th march 09. as usual,saturday. woke up late that morning,not that late,about 9am. lying around lazily,disturbing my brother,watching tv,eating maggie mee,minding my own business and suddenly,the house phone rang. i pick it up and it was my aunt from subang.
"eunice,is dady there"
"nope,he is at work,you should try his cell,he might pick up. anything urgent? do you wana talk to granny?"
"ok,i will call him. but i got to tell you something ok? just to let you know,your aunty pass away this morning about 5-6am."she was sobbing.
"WHAT??!!"
"i will talk to you later ok? let me talk to granny." and i pass the phone to my granny and after afew minutes my granny talk to her,she cried as well. i was left with shocked.
that was my aunty,and she passed away?? i cant accept the reality of it. she went to bangkok from some cancer treatment and she passed away. not because of the cancer,the cancer was getting better.but it was the mucus that make it difficult for her to breath,went into a coma,and died.my aunt,DEAD?? no way!
that week,all my family members came down to a/s and had her funeral here. only her ashes was brought back here,so,only a memorial service was carried out.her younger days picture was flashing on the projector screen,people crying,the feeling of death is thicken in the air. just as how like a funeral service should be.
i on the other hand,i feel,not to say happy,but i am not sad. i know,shes is with god and she is not in pain and she is happy,free of misery.as i sat there in the service,i wonder,what happened to her? i want to know the life after death part,i was curious. but dont worry,its just curiorsity. maybe shes in heaven,dancing joyfully,singing and praising to god. maybe shes still on earth,wondering around,maybe is even at her funeral. or maybe,we just become one with mother earth. i dont know. but all i know,1 thing is for sure, i will see her again. like what i promised her before she left. that was the last time i saw her,but i know,i will see her again. that is the main reason why im not crying at all.
death is just beginning of greater things...
"yes,i will see you,take care ok? i love you and i will miss you." i casually replied her.
as i look at her leaving,i feel a pain in my heart. i cant describe it. she looks ill.she is in her wheel chair and my mom push the chair to my dads car n help her to get in it. and she left.since then,it was never the same.
i have been praying for her,hoping she could survive just today,and maybe tomorrow will be a better day. a place in my heart,always telling me everything is alright. god it taking care of everything. and that is how i got my peace.
occasionally,my uncle will call up and tell her how is she doing. some days she will be top of her game but some days,shes down and sick. feels like she has lost her will to live.all she have was us. we are always there to support her,to love her,and to make sure shes alright.
i remembered those days when i come home from school and i can just check how was she doing and ask her does she want some fruit jus. she was staying at my house back then. i am always happy to make her some fruit jus. avacado,kiwi, green apple,banana. all this fruits were usually her choose of fruit jus.the sound of the blender bleding those fruits always annoys me and i hope that the noise didnt make her feel uncomfortable in any way.
before this,she used to make me shepards pie. and i love it. i eat them all day and night. her shepards pie are the best. massing up the potatos,cutting the carrot into cubes,slicing the onions, and chooping the frozen beef. those were the memories i have with her making shepards pie.
she was always cheerfull and happy,even when she was sick. she always think of others first. she put people first and then her needs,second. she loves her family alot. shes always the one whom remember everyones birthday. shes always there for us. she loved us.in my heart,i always knew i will see her once every year when she comes back from aussie.
saturday,7th march 09. as usual,saturday. woke up late that morning,not that late,about 9am. lying around lazily,disturbing my brother,watching tv,eating maggie mee,minding my own business and suddenly,the house phone rang. i pick it up and it was my aunt from subang.
"eunice,is dady there"
"nope,he is at work,you should try his cell,he might pick up. anything urgent? do you wana talk to granny?"
"ok,i will call him. but i got to tell you something ok? just to let you know,your aunty pass away this morning about 5-6am."she was sobbing.
"WHAT??!!"
"i will talk to you later ok? let me talk to granny." and i pass the phone to my granny and after afew minutes my granny talk to her,she cried as well. i was left with shocked.
that was my aunty,and she passed away?? i cant accept the reality of it. she went to bangkok from some cancer treatment and she passed away. not because of the cancer,the cancer was getting better.but it was the mucus that make it difficult for her to breath,went into a coma,and died.my aunt,DEAD?? no way!
that week,all my family members came down to a/s and had her funeral here. only her ashes was brought back here,so,only a memorial service was carried out.her younger days picture was flashing on the projector screen,people crying,the feeling of death is thicken in the air. just as how like a funeral service should be.
i on the other hand,i feel,not to say happy,but i am not sad. i know,shes is with god and she is not in pain and she is happy,free of misery.as i sat there in the service,i wonder,what happened to her? i want to know the life after death part,i was curious. but dont worry,its just curiorsity. maybe shes in heaven,dancing joyfully,singing and praising to god. maybe shes still on earth,wondering around,maybe is even at her funeral. or maybe,we just become one with mother earth. i dont know. but all i know,1 thing is for sure, i will see her again. like what i promised her before she left. that was the last time i saw her,but i know,i will see her again. that is the main reason why im not crying at all.
death is just beginning of greater things...
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